Hehe I'm an update whore yes I am! Okay so I think I'll just move my journal over to my website that I have and just host it there myself instead of putting up with this. That way I can host my own images and background music and it'll be apart of my website and I can make it look like I want to. Still wish I hadn't wasted my money. Oh well live and learn. Thats one of my mottos. I just have to try and figure out a way to get comments and stuff on the journal there. Hopefully I'll be able to learn though. Anyway I think I'll be off to watch some shows I recorded and then tonight I'll work on the HTML and all that. My friend Art *points to link to his site on sidebar* is looking into making his own online diary place. I think that would be awsome! I've been thinking of it for about a year but I don't have the knowledge or finance to do it. So instead I just think of ideas for it. Anyway here's a list of what I came up with.

Free basic account - can pay to upgrade (as with most)

Image hosting

Easy to customize your own look

Really awsome free templates

A place to chat with other users

Fast replying help

User Pics

Buddy/Friends list that tells you when somebody has updated

Suggestion box

Mood Icons

Calander like LJ has

Comments/notes

Tags

Search - so you can search your diary or somebody elses for a certain entry if you know whats in it

Spellcheck

Preview

banners or other ways ppl can advertise their diaries. But not on a diary just on the sites main pages. Like Diaryland does.

A notify list - lets u notify ppl who join the list when you update

HTML Help/Teachings

Reasonable pricing!!

choice between private or public posts

Anyway I have more ideas probably just can't think of them right now. Off to watch my shows. Bye my little pugglies.

Whats the point? My mother yelled at me and told me she hated me... again. After 19 years of it I guess I'm used to it. Still makes me want to cry though. I know she regrets having me. I know she hates me. I wish I was adopted because then I could just go search for my real parents and rather or not it turned out great I could write a movie about it and sell it to lifetime.


Livejournal is being a pain in my ass. I paid good money for thier paid services and turns out they all suck! I don't understand any of it! I really don't! I like how my page looks. So I just want to add some background music and be able to show off pictures I take. I was able to get a few more user pics up and update by phone which is me just bitching about livejournal. But its all getting too complicated. I don't know. Maybe I'm just stressing. When I get a moment to breathe I'll be sure to do that.


I'm ready to just burst out in tears. I'm so sick and tired of people. Why are people so mean? I'm going to go cuddle with my dog and day dream of being anywhere but here.

---

I just sent this to LJ. If they still can't tell me a simple way of doing it I'm going to send a very stern aka bitchy letter to them because this is stupid and insane. I'm sorry I'm not one of these rich people who has the money to waste on this. So I'm ticked that I gave them my money and they are ripping me off!

"Okay so I went through and read all the pages that FAQ suggested about adding background music. Now I'm even MORE confussed. I paid to upgrade so I could have background music and Its so complicated I'm begining to think its not worth it. So my question is: Is there a simple way to add background music? I have it hosted so I just figured ya'll would have a thing where you just input the URL and push a button and there ya go. All other journal sites I've used have done that. Or if I can do the code myself which I can't figure out how to do with this site either then I know the code for it. So how do I put in my own HTML and how do I add background music without getting a huge headache? "

I'm blaring Backstreet Boys and other old CDs I used to love to try and feel better. Not working...

Okay so I got two months of paid account now. To just test things out. This should be fun. So apparences and stuff could change so please be patient while I figure all the new fun stuff out.


The water is shut off around here. They are working on the pipe on our street. So I can't shower or even brush my teeth! I also can't use the toliet since I can't flush! Grrr stupid people. They aren't working on it now though. They just tore up our neighboors yard and turned off all the water and left a big bulldozer out there but now there isn't anybody out there working. I'm thinking lunch break. But we'll see. If they aren't back by 1 I shall steal their bulldozer and teach them a lesson. hahaha just kidding! Though it is tempting. Okay I'm off to go do stuff so I'll chat ya later. Chores and work and then playing with my new paid account.

I know what I want to do! I'm laying in bed and just day dreaming and it hits me. I want to own a club! Okay no I'm not rich so I can't just put down the money and go for it. This is gonna be one of those long time goals. As in saving money and going to college to learn how to manage and own a club and finding out all the things I'll need. Finding a trustworthy partner or two. All that fun stuff.



All the nights teens here try and find something to do and are always complaining there aren't any good clubs. So here's the deal how great would it be to have an all ages club. Only it won't serve alcohol. I already know what I'd name it. I've always wanted to own a club or restaurant but it was a bit of dream that was in the back of my head never really thought about it really. So now I just have to find a job and then find out what degrees and classes I need and all that good stuff. Hopefully by the time I'm 22 I'll be able to start putting it into motion. I'm 19 now so that gives me 3 years. Wish me luck!

Well yesterday was an eventfull day to say in the least! It started out really great I was hanging with Blaise and we were going to go downtown and take some photographs of the run down buildings and stuff but didn't when he started inviting people to do stuff and then he had to go by so and so's house. Long story short Drama insued. Landon, an old friend, is back in town and blaise gave him some dvds that apparently somebody wanted back and well drama. I haven't talked to Blaise in about two months and yet yesterday he calls and out of no where wants to hang out. I have a feeling he know or had a feeling drama over this was going to errupt and wanted somebody to have his back.


Landon seems to be doing better. His roommates are a lot nicer then his old ones. Anyway I finally had enough of it last night and just wanted to come home. I was having fun until this happened. Why can't these people just grow up and except responsbility for what they do and be oh I don't know somewhat MATURE! Its so damn annoying. Perfectly lovely day hanging with friends and making new friends ruined by a bunch of immature people.


I got away from all that when I left highschool. I talked to Blaise last night and told him I found it a big considence that after 2 months of basically not really talking or hanging out the day he finally decides to play "friend" again all this shit happens. I told him I don't mind hanging out with them or Landon I just don't want to be caught in any more drama.


He just said okay. I have a feeling I won't hear from Landon or Blaise for awhile. So back to being a loner. Which I think just might be best. I like people I just seem to get drawn into the crowds where they don't really care about anybody but themselves, immature, and show a huge lack of consideration for anybody. That and when we go out to eat they are really really immature and I hate that. Its one of my huge pet peeves. Act your age. I love kidding around having fun but I still think when little kids are around there are certain things you shouldn't do or say just out of class and consideration.


Well whatever I'm off to be bored. Oh ya my brother came into town and took my mom out to eat. Told her I was asleep when I wasn't. But whatever. I hate liars. Just say you want to take just her out or that you only have money to take her out. I rather have the truth then be lied to. I don't like lying to people and I don't like being lied to. But oh well. I guess I'll just go be bored and try and find something to do. I still say Landon even though he got my number won't call me lol just watch. If he does its only cuz he couldn't find anybody else to hang with.

So hard to think right now. I got a new printer and scanner. Its pretty nifty and I love it. I scanned all my old photos and saved them on my computer. I was going to find an online scrapbook thing and put them up there but turns out there are no online scrapbooks!


I think that would be nifty. LiveJournal has something called a scrapbook but its only for paid memebers and I'm not sure if its an actual scrapbook or what it is. Anyway I can do a site that looks nifty for my photos and all but I was hoping to find a website that has nifty effects like when you click the Next Page it looks like the page is turning. I know a lot about HTML and stuff but I don't know how to do that cool of stuff. So I'll just do a semi nifty scrapbook thing. It'll take awhile to make though. But here's hoping I'll like it somewhat at least.


Its so hard to think. My mind is going a million thoughts a second. I'm trying to just take a deep breathe and calm it down but it isn't working to well at the moment.


Other then that I'm not sure what else to write. I'm watching a movie on lifetime. No links this entry sorry head too spinny to stop and do the code and double check the addresses. Anyway the movie is called Nolaor something like that.


In between commercials as usual I am listening to music. A funky mix CD I made. I make some strange mix CDs...


I had a dream I had a kid... it was strange. But kinda cool. Going bye bye now.

So this is what I'm thinking...


Why is it people are prosecuted for speaking their minds. Because somebody doesn't agree with what the people in charge say and believe they are automatically looked down on. America has the freedom of speech but thats just on paper. Other countries don't have it on paper so they can get lawfully punished for their thoughts. But we still get punished for ours. I remember having teachers who I didn't agree with on a subject and when I approached my belief of the issue they would rather give me detention or tell me to shut up then to listen and admit there are other ways of thinking then just one path.


I like to think outside the box. I hated english class not because I hated writing or reading. It was the opposite. I loved reading and writing and discussing my feelings and thoughts on a book or poem. But whenever my opinion didn't mesh with the teachers I would get an F on the paper. All because I held a different opinion. Maybe this is why I'm hesitant to go to college. Why should I pay for people to tell me my opinions don't matter when I know they do.


I found it funny when I wrote a poem for class that all my fellow classmates loved even though most didn't get it and when the teacher would start analyzing it and I would stop her and tell her she's wrong thats not what I was thinking when I wrote it but simply what she was thinking when she read it. She would then become very angry with me and tell me I'm failing because I know nothing about the creative mind. I would then say "And Albert Einstein's teachers told him he knew nothing of math." Usually thats when the teacher would just get very upset with me and warn me she was going to give me detintion. I had to choose between comprimising my opions and thoughts and pass english or to not comprimise them and come close to failing. I figured no grade was worth the comprimise so I barely passed Senior english. Other enlgish classes were pretty easy to get by with but Senior English was the worst with the teacher I had.


I wasn't the only student who had problems with her either. But I had known a few teachers like her before all through out my school I'd get them every now and then.


I'm just babbling now. This probably makes no sense but oh well it makes sense inside my hair and thats all that matters.


I'm going to go and work more on learning the guitar. My hands are too small for this.. But I'm determined to get it. Besides only been trying for 2 days now. I think Danny Boy was the wrong song for me to pick though. Its very long but I'll stick to it and get it eventually. Ta-Ta for now Puglies